Finance World

Episode 25: The High Cost of Financial Comparison — Why We Measure Against the Wrong People

Series: Broken by Burden: Financial Survival Strategies for the Troubled Mind

Batch 2: Diving Deeper into the Emotional and Social Roots of Financial Strain

Date: 13 July 2025

📉 “He’s younger than me and already owns two flats. I must be doing something wrong.”

Swapan was 42. A schoolteacher in a semi-urban town near Kolkata, he lived with quiet dignity. His family never went hungry, his children were studying in decent schools, and his aging parents were cared for.

But one evening changed everything.

At a school reunion, he saw his classmates — in photos and posts — flaunting luxury SUVs, destination vacations, and designer brands. Some were in Dubai, some in Singapore, some buying villas.

That night, Swapan didn’t sleep.
He lay awake asking: “Where did I go wrong?”

Not because he was struggling — but because someone else was seemingly winning.

🧠 The Poison of Comparison

Comparison doesn’t always arise from failure. It often creeps in when we feel stable but unseen.

It says:

  • “Your life is fine… but theirs is better.”
  • “You have peace… but they have power.”
  • “You are content… but they are celebrated.”

The tragedy is:

You begin to feel poor in a life that once made you feel proud.

🔍 Why We Compare — And Always Lose

Comparison has become worse in the digital age because:

  • People only show their highlights — never their debts or depression
  • Algorithms feed us what makes us insecure
  • Our brains crave status as a sign of survival
  • Society equates net worth with self-worth

But here’s the truth:

🧾 The man who posted a new car may have 5 EMIs.
📱 The woman with designer bags may be battling anxiety.
🏡 The cousin with a villa may have no time for her own kids.

You don’t see the burden.
You only see the brag.

💡 How to Escape the Comparison Trap (Without Becoming Bitter)

1. Audit what you consume.

Unfollow or mute people, pages, and platforms that repeatedly make you question your value — even if they’re friends or family.

Curate your digital environment like your mental health depends on it. Because it does.

2. Track your own growth.

Start a “Self-Worth Journal.”
Write:

  • How you handled a crisis
  • What you did differently from last year
  • What you survived silently

You’ll see — you’re richer than you thought.

3. Redefine success in your own terms.

Is it peace? Time with children? A home without shouting? A loan-free month?

Then own it. Your definition is valid.

4. Speak gratitude aloud.

Comparison thrives in silence. Gratitude thrives in articulation.

Saying “I’m thankful I can cook at home tonight” may sound small — but it silences the inner scream of lack.

5. Talk about it.

Most people compare. Few admit it.
Start honest conversations. You’ll be surprised how many people are pretending.

🌱 Swapan’s Realization

A few months after the reunion, Swapan ran into a classmate who had posted luxury vacation pictures. After some casual conversation, the man sighed and said:

“That trip was on a personal loan. I wish I had your stability.”

That’s when Swapan realized — he hadn’t failed.
He just measured with the wrong ruler.

He now smiles when he waters his plants, hugs his daughter without checking his phone, and writes poetry instead of scrolling timelines.

He hasn’t changed his salary.
He has changed his story.

💬 If You’ve Ever Felt “Less Than” Watching Someone Else Shine…

Please remember:
What you see is the surface.
What you carry is the soul.
And what you define — is what you become.

The only person you should be better than is the version of you who forgot their own worth.

🔜 Next Episode Teaser:

Episode 26: The Loneliness of Breadwinners — When Earning Makes You Emotionally Invisible
In the next episode, we’ll explore how society glorifies breadwinners while emotionally isolating them — and how financial providers often suffer in silence, misunderstood and un-thanked.

⚠️ Disclaimer:

This blog series is intended for informational, motivational, and emotional support purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional financial, legal, or mental health advice. If you or someone you know is experiencing overwhelming financial stress, mental health issues, or suicidal thoughts, please seek help from a certified financial advisor, counselor, or licensed therapist. If you are in immediate danger or crisis, contact a mental health helpline or emergency service in your area.

The stories presented here are inspired by real experiences but may be anonymized or adapted for narrative clarity. Readers are encouraged to make decisions based on their unique circumstances and to consult appropriate professionals. The author and publisher disclaim any responsibility for actions taken based on this content.

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