Episode 61: The Son-in-Law Who Never Worked — When Entitlement Becomes a Family’s Financial Cancer
Series: Broken by Burden: Financial Survival Strategies for the Troubled Mind
Date: 26 Aug 2025
🎭 The Living Room Guest Who Never Left
Saroj Devi, 62, lived in a modest single-story house in Aligarh, Uttar Pradesh. A retired schoolteacher, she had spent her life raising two daughters with discipline, devotion, and dreams — all stitched into the edge of her cotton sarees. Widowed early, Saroj never remarried. Her world revolved around her younger daughter, Sneha, who was always the brightest in school and later pursued B.Ed. to follow in her mother’s footsteps.
But then came Ramesh — charismatic, well-spoken, and always available with a quick smile and compliments. He met Sneha during her teacher training. With no real job but abundant charm, he convinced both mother and daughter of his “upcoming plans” — a coaching institute he was going to start, “once things fell into place.”
They married quietly.
🛋️ And Ramesh never left.
🕯️ Year One: The Guest Who Became the Burden
Ramesh moved into Saroj’s home after marriage “just for a few months,” while he got his institute started. Months became years. His coaching institute never materialized — always one loan away, always one approval short.
He woke at 9:30 a.m., read the newspaper leisurely, scrolled through Instagram, and took his evening tea sharp at 5:00 p.m.
Meanwhile, Sneha got a job in a private school, earning ₹12,000 a month.
Saroj managed the household from her pension.
Ramesh managed… well, nothing.
💬 Snippets of Reality
Sneha (counting bills):
“Ma, my salary’s gone — school van fees, Ramesh’s medicines, groceries. Can I borrow from your pension again?”
Saroj (hesitant):
“You should ask him to contribute something, beta. At least take tuitions?”
Sneha (softly):
“He gets angry if I question. Says he’s not a servant. That his pride matters.”
Saroj (sighs):
“Then let him feed his pride, not his mouth.”
💢 The Boiling Point
One afternoon, Saroj returned from LIC to find the refrigerator gone.
Saroj (startled):
“Where’s the fridge?”
Ramesh (casually):
“Relax, Ammaji. I sold it for ₹7,000 to pay my friend back. I’ll buy a new one next month.”
That night, Saroj didn’t eat. She sat in the dark, staring at her pension book.
Her only security, disappearing month after month into a man who neither earned nor apologized.
🧠 Character Psychology
- Ramesh is not unemployed — he is entitled. He believes marriage is his job, and his in-laws are the HR department.
- Sneha is emotionally trapped — raised to be adjusting, she cannot question without guilt.
- Saroj is from a generation where silence was a virtue. But silence is now her punishment.
Ramesh is not abusive in the traditional sense. He doesn’t hit.
He erodes — slowly draining energy, dignity, and financial security.
📉 Financial Lessons from a Parasite in the House
- Marry character, not charisma.
- A charming man without consistency is like a cheque without a signature.
- Never compromise on financial contribution in a partnership.
- Love is not a substitute for responsibility.
- Mothers, teach daughters to demand equity, not endurance.
- Adjustments don’t mean self-erasure.
- Keep your pension protected.
- Always separate your retirement corpus from your family’s day-to-day expenses.
- Set boundaries early.
- Even in Indian joint families, it’s not selfish to ask: What are you contributing?
🌱 Where They Are Now
After two years of slow bleeding, Saroj finally took a stand. She visited her lawyer and changed her will — giving the house in Sneha’s name only if she lives independently or contributes to household income.
Sneha, jolted by the reality, encouraged Ramesh to apply for an actual job — not an imaginary dream. When he resisted, she started applying for transfers and is now considering a move to Agra, without him.
“I was afraid I’d break the marriage,” she said.
“But I realized I was breaking my mother instead.”
Episode 62: Job Loss and Identity Crisis — When Unemployment Feels Like a Personal Failure
In the next episode, we explore how sudden job loss affects mental health, self-worth, and relationships — and how to rebuild when the rug is pulled from under your feet..
⚠️ Disclaimer:
This blog series is intended for emotional and financial reflection. It is not a substitute for professional advice. If you or someone you know is facing emotional distress, domestic manipulation, or financial abuse, please consult a licensed mental health professional, legal advisor, or financial planner. Names and scenarios are fictionalized to protect identities but are based on real stories and societal patterns.
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